Dear College Student, 

One of the richest parts of my life happened between 20-27. So much of life happened in those years. I was able to travel all over the country, live in some of the greatest cities, and meet some of the most interesting people. I don’t know how you measure life, but I measure mine by conversations. In my twenties, the conversations were rich.

Since I have been out of my twenties, for a “few years,” a common question that I have been asked by college students is this: 


What just happened in that thing called high school? 


Whomever I am speaking with usually begins laughing after asking the question. It’s an honest question. You know this. High School goes by so quickly. College is faster. Out of that conversation comes an even bigger question: 


What does it mean to be on my own? 


It’s another great question. It’s one that ever 20 something has to answer. It may be asked in different forms. I know that there is a lot for a 20 something to be thinking about – GPA, dating, roommates, enough food, food your roommate stole, work, finding the right internship, etc. 

I’m going to suggest reading three books that answer the above questions. I get it. You are thinking, “I might read it at Christmas. I have so much of a school load.”We often fly through life without really checking in on who we are and who we are becoming.

These three books have helped me tremendously: 

1. Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud and John Townsend

  • Great challenges for living with roommates 
  • Understanding the difference between what’s your responsibility with others and what their responsibility is in a relationship. 
  • Working through the tough stuff of wanting to say “no” but not know how. 

2. Safe People by Dr. Henry Cloud and John Townsend 

  • We know what insanity means, yet we often go back to the same relationship expecting different results. 
  • Great for understanding how unhealthy people function and how they can pull you in. 
  • Insights for learning how to be a safe relationship for someone else. 

3. Spirit Controlled Temperament By Tim LaHaye 

  • This should be the first book you read. It deals primarily with you. 
  • It gives you tools to work with people you don’t like, understand, or find annoying. 
  • Tools are provided to work with people who have a different temperament than you do. You can learn to get along with dominant and submissive people. 
  • The best book I’ve read this year. 


I hope you have a great school year! College is great. There is so much tension between what is uncertain and what you are coming to know for sure.

Always remember this: 


Who you are becoming is a gift. It’s a gift to your friends, significant other, your church, employer, future spouse, and even your sons and daughters. Most importantly, It’s a gift to yourself. 


We Are The Results Of One Another, 

Ben Siemon 

*All books can be found at 


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